Oh, I know very well your feelings on fate. Mostly that it can go fuck itself. Kinda like the idea, too. This, us, that sure wasn't written in the books. We made this happen.
[The only people in the timeline, in the TVA, with free will--]
Turn your unreasonably tall ass around; I'm gonna get all up in that hair and massage your scalp and leave you feeling like a new man. You're definitely gonna have to use a hair dryer though like the rest of us pathetic mortals. No magicking it dry and styled.
[An annoyance, maybe, but it's also going to mean cuddling up can include combing out those pretty locks.]
Hairdryers are rather loud [ Loki complains preemptively because...they are, especially for something meant to be used so close to one's ears. But he does turn as instructed, titling his face into the spray from the shower and using the loofah still in his hand to soap up the front of his body. ]
I'm glad we made this happen. [ He's glad they chose one another like this. ]
[He won't make any smart comments, because sometimes it's better to let Loki whine. And anyway, he's got his own little job to do. Working the lather into Loki's hair, all the way from root to tip. He's industrial about it at first, just making sure to do the job right.
And then he indulges. Fingertips rubbing along temples, stroking down to the nape of Loki's neck. The gentle run of nails along scalp, and pulling through any tangles found along the way.
From here, he can see some of the results of their work. Red lines of scratches down Loki's back. The remnant of a bite along his neck. At the right angle, he can spy the edges of several bruises left on a thigh. Not to mention a well-ridden ass.]
[ There's a series of pleased sighs from the man in front of him, who has forgone continuing the work of cleaning himself in favor of just... reveling in this experience of being cared for by someone who actually cares for him. It's nice in a way things have not been nice for him in a long time, and the part of his brain that insists that all good things end well before they're due wants to memorize it. ]
When? [ He asks, because he's curious as to just what sort of pattern Mobius plans on falling into, here. He knows it won't be immediately; most humans aren't quite built that way, and that's fine.
Loki also wants to ask what they'll do if someone finds out, but. Maybe not at this exact moment. Maybe he doesn't want to ruin it. ]
[That pulls a curious sound out of Mobius. Not the kind of question he was expecting.] Whenever? [Hm, no, that is probably not the best answer.] Obviously not, y'know. When there's a job to do. But when we're both up for it. I wasn't exactly planning on jotting you down in a schedule book, Loki. Put you on top of my to-do list.
[He's gentle when he angles Loki just so under the spray, just as thorough in washing the lather out as putting it in in the first place.] Besides, looks like you could use a little bit to recover.
[ He closes his eyes when Mobius moves him, humming his consideration as he shuffles Mobius' answer in his mind. Whenever there's not a job to do. Whenever they both are up for it. That sounds all well and good. Does he want to be scheduled in? He wrinkles his nose as he'd opened his mouth to say something and gotten water in it for his trouble.
Bleh.
He tilts his chin down. He supposes needing time to recover is both more or less normal and probably connected with being unable to use his magic here. He supposes needing time to recover is not a terrible thing.
[It's much harder to read Loki staring at his back, even the shrug of his shoulders. Would Mobius like to do this again right now, definitely, absolutely, he would like to be doing this all of the time in fact. He lets a hand roam lower, traces a finger along one of the marks left behind.]
We'll make time. [The irony of the statement is, of course, not lost on him.] I can always make time for you.
[ Loki turns his head just enough to see the general shape of his friend in his peripheral vision. ] I feel very needy, in this moment, [ he tells him quietly. He doesn't want Mobius to think that he's not appreciative of the time they do spend together, and it's not like Loki is close to anyone else here, besides Hunter B-15. The bulk of his time spent around others is spent around Mobius, actually.
Which is a comfort, now that he thinks about it. ] I'm sure it will pass.
[He coaxes Loki the rest of the way around so as to kiss him again. Normally, Mobius might not want to feed into something like neediness from Loki. But it's hardly inappropriate at this moment. Want him to feel needed. Wants him to feel loved. Soothe away the worries.]
I'm here. [Not that he's planning on be anywhere else for a while.] You just tell me what you need.
[ The kiss is nice. Easy to get lost in, to quiet whatever unruly noises are currently trying to overwhelm him in his head.
Telling Mobius what he needs? Is harder. He's used to articulating the things he wants, not determining which things are necessary. ]
I don't want to be alone, [ is what he settles on. Not that he thought there was much of a risk of that tonight, but. Another shrug. ] What happens if we're caught?
Then we deal with it. We'll figure it out when we get there. [A thought, then. Because Loki doesn't want to be alone, knows Loki never wants to be alone ever again.] You don't want to feel like you're hiding. You don't want to hide this, huh?
[Which is sweet, actually. And Mobius might like to be more forthcoming, too, but it's not that simple. Nothing's ever that simple.]
This isn't a good idea. It's a great idea. It's the best idea either of us ever had, and I'm not just saying that because a post-coital glow or whatever you want to call it. You and me, this could be really something special. But I think we need to figure out what that something is first. Okay?
I am, historically, very bad at hiding. [ He likes to be showy and seen, but more importantly this... whatever it is, between him and Mobius, matters, much like whatever is between himself and Sylvie matters, and Loki has never been good at hiding what matters. He can change how he looks at it, or weave illusions about it, but hiding? Not so much.
He hears Mobius' request for what it is though. Time to figure out what they're doing, together, before anyone else gets involved. So he nods. ] Okay.
I wanna scream it from rooftops as much as you do, but I don't even know where we stand as far as...I don't know, what we even call ourselves. Partners? Boyfriends? You're definitely significant and an other, but I don't think significant other is the phrase we want to shoot for right now.
[It somehow is simultaneously too fast and also just right, like they slot together perfectly, two puzzle pieces that have been getting shuffled around time and space before finally ending up in the same box. Mobius leaves a few kisses along Loki's shoulders, avoiding any potentially tender looking spots.]
And if you want to talk about this, us, [because they're going to need to and they both know it] we absolutely can, it can just wait until we're cozy in bed first.
I think if we called ourselves partners, I doubt anyone would recognize that as meaning anything new or different from what we've been doing. [ Namely, being friends. Being partners in the field.
Does what they call themselves as a collective unit matter that much? He'll have to ask. Later, in bed, apparently.
Loki's face does something sappy when Mobius kisses his shoulders, he can tell by the feel of his features. ] I can wait. [ For once. ]
Good. Cuz I want to just enjoy this. I'll help you finish wash up, then we'll get you all dry and pretty, and then you can cuddle up and chat to your hearts content. [And he won't even point out that adorable face Loki's pulling. Isn't that sweet of him. Especially when it makes him grin like a doofus himself.
And he will help out. Because touching Loki is going to apparently be his new pastime, and so is stealing kisses from Loki whenever possible, and being kind when kindness is called for. When'd he get so soft (and apparently also hard) for this particular variant? He's not sure he could even pinpoint a moment. But hopefully it'll never come to an end, either.]
[ Loki is as good as his word, at this point. He lets Mobius help him finish getting clean, dry his hair while he makes faces but doesn't actually vocalize any complaints, and is happy to allow him to steal as many kisses as Mobius can manage.
It's not like it's terrible, or anything. He rather likes it.
Once they're in bed, however, all bets on remaining quiet are off. Loki opens with: ]
Does what we call each other, boyfriends, partners, whatever, really matter that much?
[It's more work than he normally puts in on a first go-round, if he's honest. But Loki's worth it. The amount of care involved. Was he looking for something like this all along, maybe? Someone to take care of? Hm. Set that thought aside.
He hums along the curve of Loki's shoulder, giving the question a once-over.] Sometimes people use words like that to know where they stand with each other. Sometimes used to define themselves to the world. [Friends-with-benefits could be appropriate, then, but it's a little crude for Mobius' taste.] If it doesn't matter to you, then it doesn't matter to me.
[Not the word itself. It doesn't really matter. But that doesn't keep him from wondering what exactly they are as a duo, what they are to each other. Is it too soon for something like that? Or maybe it's not fair to even ask. Where else would Loki even go? Who else besides Sylvie would he see?
Anywhere, if he could. And maybe anyone. If he could. He doesn't ask a question that comes to mind, presses the absence of it as a kiss to Loki's skin.]
I don't care what the world thinks, [ he states quite frankly, because what business is it of anyone else's? What Mobius thinks, however, is of paramount importance, and Loki turns over so he can face the man ]. I realize that's easy for me to say. No one thinks well of me, it's to be expected that someone will have an opinion about my behavior that I don't care to hear.
[ It would be easy to be the villain in this, from the outside. Of course Loki took advantage of the one person who showed him kindness; what else would he do with that? ]
I care about what you think. If it's important to you then it's important.
[He lets it hang, tip of his tongue between his teeth. If Loki wants to watch him instead of being the watched, then...that's fine. It's allowed, deserved even. Mobius doesn't meet his gaze. It still wants to slither up his throat and out of his traitor mouth, a question (a statement, an accusation) unbidden, but he manages to hold it back. He tries again.]
It's not the word that matters. Just wondering where you see this going, though. What you want this to be.
[It isn't funny, he knows, but he laughs anyway.] It really is friends-with-benefits, huh. [And maybe it sounds crude given the connotations associated with it, but. Is it all that bad? Being friends. Who also fuck. And care deeply enough that it's surely supposed to be something beyond just friends. There's nothing wrong with friends. Loki could use a few more in his life. Maybe he could use more friends than he could use a fuckbuddy or a potential romantic partner. (Sylvie, apparently, aside.)]
We can figure that part out as we go, too. I don't want to push you with expectations. That wouldn't be fair to you. Probably not to either one of us.
Is the presumed benefit sex? [ Because if so, he's not seeing what's wrong with that title, exactly.
Sylvie, he would argue, is different. Difficult to define. It doesn't help that he hasn't tried to have this conversation with her at this point, though.
He frowns a little at the word 'expectations'. Everyone has expectations, he thinks. There's nothing... intrinsically wrong with that. ]
Yeah, that's the benefits part. It's a bit more...casual than we maybe wanna be, but I can't say it's inaccurate.
[He is not going to call Loki a friend with a benefit, dear god. But it's not satisfying Loki, apparently. Does he want expectations? He shouldn't. Mobius drums his fingers lightly on Loki's arm, presses another kiss to his shoulder. How does he find the words for this?]
I don't want to make presumptions about where you want this to go. I don't want to make you think we have to be...anything more than whatever we are now. I've got some pretty human ideas about, [love?] persisting relationships, I guess, that maybe don't jive with your own expectations.
A little, [ Loki admits, raising his eyebrows because he's just confused and wants to know what it is that 'pretty human ideas about persisting relationships' means, exactly. Still. He reaches out and touches Mobius' cheek and looks at him seriously. ]
You're the one of us who has some sort of frame of reference for what we're doing.
If there's something you expect from me because it would make you happier, I'd rather know about it.
You know that's a little terrifying, right? [The notion that he's the one that has any idea what he's doing. That might be a dangerous assumption to make.] We can just let this ride and see where it takes us. Even if we made any decisions now, we'd be free to change them later. If being friends who also get up to very sexy hijinks is the comfortable thing, then...
[Is that enough? And on the other hand, isn't that what a relationship is, ultimately? Loki makes him happy. It's not like they're going to have some big wedding ceremony and go retire to Tahiti and raise some kids or something. They're dealing with the hands they've got. Loki makes him happy, and that is more than enough.] I don't want you to feel like you have to change to please me when I'm over here trying to make sure you're happy and comfortable and pleased yourself. No one spends enough time on you.
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[The only people in the timeline, in the TVA, with free will--]
Turn your unreasonably tall ass around; I'm gonna get all up in that hair and massage your scalp and leave you feeling like a new man. You're definitely gonna have to use a hair dryer though like the rest of us pathetic mortals. No magicking it dry and styled.
[An annoyance, maybe, but it's also going to mean cuddling up can include combing out those pretty locks.]
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I'm glad we made this happen. [ He's glad they chose one another like this. ]
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And then he indulges. Fingertips rubbing along temples, stroking down to the nape of Loki's neck. The gentle run of nails along scalp, and pulling through any tangles found along the way.
From here, he can see some of the results of their work. Red lines of scratches down Loki's back. The remnant of a bite along his neck. At the right angle, he can spy the edges of several bruises left on a thigh. Not to mention a well-ridden ass.]
We're definitely doing this again.
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When? [ He asks, because he's curious as to just what sort of pattern Mobius plans on falling into, here. He knows it won't be immediately; most humans aren't quite built that way, and that's fine.
Loki also wants to ask what they'll do if someone finds out, but. Maybe not at this exact moment. Maybe he doesn't want to ruin it. ]
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[He's gentle when he angles Loki just so under the spray, just as thorough in washing the lather out as putting it in in the first place.] Besides, looks like you could use a little bit to recover.
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Bleh.
He tilts his chin down. He supposes needing time to recover is both more or less normal and probably connected with being unable to use his magic here. He supposes needing time to recover is not a terrible thing.
There's a shrug. ] Alright.
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We'll make time. [The irony of the statement is, of course, not lost on him.] I can always make time for you.
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Which is a comfort, now that he thinks about it. ] I'm sure it will pass.
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I'm here. [Not that he's planning on be anywhere else for a while.] You just tell me what you need.
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Telling Mobius what he needs? Is harder. He's used to articulating the things he wants, not determining which things are necessary. ]
I don't want to be alone, [ is what he settles on. Not that he thought there was much of a risk of that tonight, but. Another shrug. ] What happens if we're caught?
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[Which is sweet, actually. And Mobius might like to be more forthcoming, too, but it's not that simple. Nothing's ever that simple.]
This isn't a good idea. It's a great idea. It's the best idea either of us ever had, and I'm not just saying that because a post-coital glow or whatever you want to call it. You and me, this could be really something special. But I think we need to figure out what that something is first. Okay?
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He hears Mobius' request for what it is though. Time to figure out what they're doing, together, before anyone else gets involved. So he nods. ] Okay.
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[It somehow is simultaneously too fast and also just right, like they slot together perfectly, two puzzle pieces that have been getting shuffled around time and space before finally ending up in the same box. Mobius leaves a few kisses along Loki's shoulders, avoiding any potentially tender looking spots.]
And if you want to talk about this, us, [because they're going to need to and they both know it] we absolutely can, it can just wait until we're cozy in bed first.
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Does what they call themselves as a collective unit matter that much? He'll have to ask. Later, in bed, apparently.
Loki's face does something sappy when Mobius kisses his shoulders, he can tell by the feel of his features. ] I can wait. [ For once. ]
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And he will help out. Because touching Loki is going to apparently be his new pastime, and so is stealing kisses from Loki whenever possible, and being kind when kindness is called for. When'd he get so soft (and apparently also hard) for this particular variant? He's not sure he could even pinpoint a moment. But hopefully it'll never come to an end, either.]
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It's not like it's terrible, or anything. He rather likes it.
Once they're in bed, however, all bets on remaining quiet are off. Loki opens with: ]
Does what we call each other, boyfriends, partners, whatever, really matter that much?
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He hums along the curve of Loki's shoulder, giving the question a once-over.] Sometimes people use words like that to know where they stand with each other. Sometimes used to define themselves to the world. [Friends-with-benefits could be appropriate, then, but it's a little crude for Mobius' taste.] If it doesn't matter to you, then it doesn't matter to me.
[Not the word itself. It doesn't really matter. But that doesn't keep him from wondering what exactly they are as a duo, what they are to each other. Is it too soon for something like that? Or maybe it's not fair to even ask. Where else would Loki even go? Who else besides Sylvie would he see?
Anywhere, if he could. And maybe anyone. If he could. He doesn't ask a question that comes to mind, presses the absence of it as a kiss to Loki's skin.]
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[ It would be easy to be the villain in this, from the outside. Of course Loki took advantage of the one person who showed him kindness; what else would he do with that? ]
I care about what you think. If it's important to you then it's important.
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[He lets it hang, tip of his tongue between his teeth. If Loki wants to watch him instead of being the watched, then...that's fine. It's allowed, deserved even. Mobius doesn't meet his gaze. It still wants to slither up his throat and out of his traitor mouth, a question (a statement, an accusation) unbidden, but he manages to hold it back. He tries again.]
It's not the word that matters. Just wondering where you see this going, though. What you want this to be.
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[ He can tell Mobius is holding something back. What he can't tell is whether or not he wants to know what it is right now. ]
I want you in my life. I don't know... about the rest. I've never done this before, not. In any way that mattered.
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We can figure that part out as we go, too. I don't want to push you with expectations. That wouldn't be fair to you. Probably not to either one of us.
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Sylvie, he would argue, is different. Difficult to define. It doesn't help that he hasn't tried to have this conversation with her at this point, though.
He frowns a little at the word 'expectations'. Everyone has expectations, he thinks. There's nothing... intrinsically wrong with that. ]
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[He is not going to call Loki a friend with a benefit, dear god. But it's not satisfying Loki, apparently. Does he want expectations? He shouldn't. Mobius drums his fingers lightly on Loki's arm, presses another kiss to his shoulder. How does he find the words for this?]
I don't want to make presumptions about where you want this to go. I don't want to make you think we have to be...anything more than whatever we are now. I've got some pretty human ideas about, [love?] persisting relationships, I guess, that maybe don't jive with your own expectations.
I'm being kind of shit at this, aren't I.
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You're the one of us who has some sort of frame of reference for what we're doing.
If there's something you expect from me because it would make you happier, I'd rather know about it.
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[Is that enough? And on the other hand, isn't that what a relationship is, ultimately? Loki makes him happy. It's not like they're going to have some big wedding ceremony and go retire to Tahiti and raise some kids or something. They're dealing with the hands they've got. Loki makes him happy, and that is more than enough.] I don't want you to feel like you have to change to please me when I'm over here trying to make sure you're happy and comfortable and pleased yourself. No one spends enough time on you.
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